And I Cried…

I usually don’t cry unless I’m in a really sad mood for a long time…but tonight I cried out of almost no where!

Two Realizations:

1. Loneliness. At that moment I really missed my family which I haven’t been with for almost a year now. I am very close to them and it has always been a struggle to grow away from my family. Fortunately I have my parents who keep in contact with me virtually everyday…but it’s different. Yes I miss seeing them but I miss the FEELing the love of my family, like when we’re eating dinner together around the table. I’m feeling fine really! I’m not depressed, ask any of my friends, I’m a super cheerful person. Can’t a guy long for what’s most important in life?

2. Love. Speaking of Love, I’ve also realized, especially in Singapore, that I interact with people in order for them to really like and even love me. I think it’s ok for me to admit that when I meet a beautiful girl, the first thing that will run through my mind is “How can I make her Love me?” As shocking as that may sound, it’s a strangely familiar question both men and women ask themselves. This has lead many including myself to act in unacceptable ways towards others. In other words, I do things in for the wrong reasons.

Then how do I Love for the right reasons? If I want to love, I love with positive intentions for that person, not my gratification. I love because it’s what everyone above all else only wants love. Is it possible to love someone with out romance? or sex? Yep. Friendship, brotherhood, sisterhood, and family…hood. And it feels good! If I love for the right reasons…I won’t feel lonely. I will feel loved. I’m always loved because God loves me. Simple.

Back to why I cried…I cried because because I realize then that Love, this value, drives me tremendously in my life. I cried because I was lonely and felt alone but that’s when I felt the Father’s Love inside me as well as all the great memories of the people around me. I felt touched. I felt loved.

Ps. Dare to say things as it is. Directly. Honestly.

(PS for POE ppl: blogs are more powerful for the associated position rather from meta, don’t you think?)