I learned a valuable and painful lesson today.
All through my life I’ve had many of the basic necessities (ie. food, umbrellas, utensils, cups, clothes etc) provided for me by my parents. I’ve also been used to taking those which I assume is mine also because it belongs to my famly, but now living with stangers it’s a lot different. Though when first arrived here in Singapore I had small difficulties living with roomates, but i could never figure out why. Even at work, I would borrow many things in order to save money by not buying it myself. However, I realized that i became very dependant on others to solve my problems or help me solve it. I’m so used to taking things and returning it back when i’m done with it, no fuss, but now i have to ask for permission for everything i borrow…which is very troublesome to me.
I’m so used to sharing everything I own without questions asked. Really! I don’t hessitate, I assume people would do the same to me. Unfortunately, as I discovered, was not the case. Sometimes when people offer food or whatever, they do it as good will, but they don’t expect you to keep on taking it after the 1st time. So I’ve learned that what i buy is mine, is mine, and what other people offer me doesnt mean it’s mine. It may seem funny to you, but this is a pattern in my life.
So, I’m striving to be come more self-sustainable and not depending on others all the time. I want to be more like my younger brother who is in a sense quite a polar opposite from me. He want’s do figure out everything out himself and don’t wasn’t anyones help.
This week has been full of super highs and super lows. Boy, everyday is really an adventure for me, nothing is predictable and at the same time I enjoy it fully. Who said change wasn’t painful?